Thursday, November 26, 2009

375. from the bottom of my heart

Marrying an old bachelor is like buying a second hand furniture -Jackson Brown Junior

In India, the average Joe marries at the age of 26. I am already one year late. Am I a second hand furniture? That was a shocker of a news for me. Half of the bachelors in India would be sad to read this quote. I was sad too. In fact, i cried a little too.

Second hand... Second hand... Second hand.. These words echoed in my mind. My alter-ego added fuel to the fire with his hard hitting words;

" Chriz! What have you achieved all these years?"

" You are fit for nothing"

" Even Rakhi Sawant finds her way into the news. Why can't you create some news?"
" You neither have a girlfriend, nor fame and fortune"
All these insulting words egged me on to create some news. But What can a single, 27 year old bachelor do to create news? ( Don't tell me that Mahendra Singh Dhoni is a single 27 year old bachelor too). I cannot do an item number like Mallika Sherawat. All I can do is stand inside water and show my bare back like this.

How many of you, out there tilted your heads to your left to have a better view of Chronicwriter's back? Curiosity; sure kills the cat! Ain't it? I am not going to try the easy way of becoming famous by verbally attacking Sachin Tendulkar. I am not emotionally impotent like the Tal Backerey's of the Arabian sea. The only weapon that i have with me is my humor page.Without a reader a like you, i would not have come all this way. When I started this blog, one of my inspiration was " Jammy". He was voted as the second most humorous blogger in India by indibloggies in 2006. I had a dream then -" To become one of the most humorous bloggers in India".
Now i have an opportunity to become the best in the business. The indibloggies jury has selected my blog in the final -list for the most humorous blog category. It is indeed a great honour to be pitted along some of the Big-humor-guns of the country. So if i have touched your heart/tickled your funny bone with my humor, you can vote for me. Click this [link] to vote for me. My Blog is in the 5th category " Most humorous indiblog category" . Blog name is "Chronicwriter". When you vote, use your email id to vote. You will get a confirmation mail to your email id. Just confirm it. It is as simple as this.
Winning this coveted award is entirely dependant on your mouse clicks. You can show love and affection for me by voting from different e-mail ids too . I remember when i was a kid, i used to tell my classmates that i had voted in the elections. Making them believe me was so simple. All i had to do was apply a black mark on my middle finger using my black Reynolds pen. Those were the days.
On this day, I would like to thank everyone who has travelled along with me in my blogging journey including the guy who came here looking for "Namitha - sexy thighs in bed" and vowed never to ever come back to this blog again. This journey was tough. My only weapon was humor. Initially, my only effort was to pull in as many comments as possible. If 10 readers comment on my page, I would individually reply to all the 10 comments and hence i would have a total of 20 comments on my page. I had to struggle to get comments on my page in the earlier days.
If i had been a girl or at least pretended to be one, i would have had million hits in the very first year. I was amazed by their ability to pull in almost 100 comments for a " I am crying today" blog post, that includes 7o "Don't worry" comments and other suggestions that include " call me", " I am there for you", " Love you " ,"awww", "Hugs". I never had a clue to rake in comments like that during my early blogging days. But as time went by, i started receiving a good number comments too which included constructive criticism as well as anonymous bashings. Soon I realised that raking in comments does not really matter. What really matters is -How you make the readers feel? and What you provide for your readers?. It took me a long time to understand this simple truth.
My blogger friends helped me a lot to increase my blog traffic. Facebook and twitter also played a great role. I should also thank Google for directing many readers to my blog even for search words like " Jessica Alba Nibbles " , " Paris Hilton red underwear", "Pamela anderson silicon implants". I would like to say sorry to all such guys whose hopes were shattered after realising that this ain't a porn page.I also thank all those lovely souls who constantly send me mails encouraging me for all my posts. I also thank all the wonderful people who have blogrolled me, bookmarked my page and receive my blog posts through emails.
Special mention to Rakesh for forwarding some of my humor posts through e-mails. I got one of my own posts as a forwarded e-mail too. I was so happy. But when I saw that my name was replaced by your name, i was angry for sometime. But my anger was short lived when i got the mail from you mentioning that your girlfriend liked that mail so much and that is the reason for you doing such an act (Hope your girlfriend is not reading this post of mine) . If she is Hot, let her read this post; If not, you can keep her.
So What if i am a second hand furniture? I have my blog and that makes me happy.

Don't forget to vote for -Chronicwriter


  1. i have voted fr u, but i agree with u on one thing - its hw u make ppl feel that is imp, we both work on same principle, u on humour, me on romance.....lets take a pledge nt to forget it :D

    cheers, keep penning!

  2. Thalaivar Vaazhga !!! Christopher vaazhga.. Vote enna.. I ll also do campaign for you.. U ve made my days in lotsa instances

  3. BEAUTIFUL POST. All the very best Chriz. And you have made it to the doorstep of your dream which itself shows your convictions. Let me tell you, of all those who comment you have won a few hearts at least, making them smile which as I keep iterating is the biggest charity in the world.

    Although seemingly sexist, I agree with your views on blogs written by some girls. Some do have quality content and even those that do not get precisely the sort of comments you have mentioned. I was pleasantly amused, even happy, to find it here because I might never have said that myself. :D

    Continue to make us Laugh. Indeed, Humour is your talent but NOT limit; so dress this world with its yarn as much as you want. I for one will be around. :)

  4. @ekam : thanks much

    @HR : keep your romance alive. stay young.. :) thanks for the support

    @aishwarya : TR is the only thalaivar. i am just the vaal. thanks aish

  5. @srini : you are one personality who has always corrected me when i go wrong with my grammar. thanks for that

    yus.. the woman blogger view sounds as if i am a MCP.. the view is true though ( not in every case )

    Thanks a bunch for the support

  6. I voted for you the second I read your last post.

    People might have numerous talents but none of them an parallel someone's ability to make people smile or laugh. Glad to be your reader =)

  7. @swati : i can sing for you :) thanks

  8. i voted...i hope u win...there is tough competition u c...but hoping u do...i would love to see ur book someday...

    take care and keep writing...!!!

  9. I think its about time to file a public petition and give it your parents.... just for one thing..

    "Please make sure that your son gets married ASAP, he is getting desperate and developing a dual personality syndrome"..

  10. and by the way ur not any second furniture...what would u call girls like me then??? way beyond the marriageable age...but a thought to ponder...really...

  11. If you're second hand, then you're the most humorous, interesting second hand person I have ever met! Don't let such stupid quotes get you down ma boi :D

    Congrats once again on the nomination! I am fan of Jammy too !! :)

  12. Damm u man... u will win it this time as i was late for nomination...:P

    yeh saal u enjoy... i will beat u next year..

    mu ha ha ha ha

  13. @rinzu : aawwwww

    @vaisakh : very nice idea..writing a petition now

    @ dhanya : i am having tears in my eyes now

    @ ravan : i am lucky that way bro.. thank you

  14. voted already, but i am thinking about myself as second hand furniture too.

  15. :p...second hand or first hand ur the best bro....well those silly things should not let u down ....just chill....i voted more then once... u should give me a special party :P..


  16. i voted for u as well as promoted ur link on both my fan pages in fb ....

    wonderful post bro,..i will campaign fr u ..wd make it reach most of them....amazing blogger u r nd bro u deserve the best humour writer award...

    nd hand furniture nvr mind..u write well.. yp tal backerays nd all well said .... keep writing nd spread more smiles....

    u r an amazing blogger...:)

    all the best :)

  17. sooo.. done...
    all the very best to you!!!

  18. hey voted but the confirmation link doesn't work for me :-(

  19. "You can show love and affection for me by voting from different e-mail ids too" -hahaha... nethe vote potachu..idhayum panniduvom...all the best.. may u win..

  20. voted!!!

    read a few of your insanely hilarious posts recently and completely loved it! following you from here on...


  21. I voted yesterday only dear...all the best :)


  22. Great post! Now a days, it doesn't matter if you are a second hand or even 'third' hand. Quality is the only matter.

  23. voted and lemme tell you, you have said exactly how comments are for guys and gals, i so wanted write abt that, but you just made it worth more in this post :)

    no problem if you are a second hand furniture chriz, you are still tough in the blogging world, i so envy you seeing that followers, which keep going up and up.. well i just pray that let you have more comments and followers :)

    take care and keep writing..............

  24. I voted twice yesterday and today once more.. Chris you are definitely gonna win this thing!!:P:P:D

  25. yu dont need to tel me Chriz...voted for yu!! sure yu are the best and my inspiration! doesnt mean i wont put up my foto like yu did!

  26. thala,unga blog eh padichchu naan sirichchatha paarthu veetla enna mentalne nenachurkaanga!
    you shld be the first in this contest!
    naanum ponnungala impress panna ennanavo panalaamnu yosippen..but ethuvum velaiku aagala!

  27. hello CW,
    Just voted for you 3 times, clicked the mouse multiple times, one ran away and another one pooped, yeah many guys in the world search for jessica alba's nipples, but surprisingly my USP is nagercoil sex aunties, if u want proof, check my feedjit traffic feed.

  28. vote bhi dalo and wo bhi itna complicated process se

    phew :D

    voted and for killing the cat... I skipped the part where u were there bare backed :D

  29. first time here, enjoyed the first post i read and to boost your morale, voted for u too :))

    will keep reading and smiling too :)

  30. Neraya vote potachu... will continue voting too :P.. NO i won't vote after contest gets over :P All the besht Mr. Chriz

  31. As someone who spends her old age blogging and is also nominated in the Humanities category, I need to tell you that I still dont get any "Awww" posts, and you need to be grateful that Google searches for Jessica Alba,Paris Hilton et al, and pushes people on to your blog. (I have had folks searching for "chennai soapy massage" landing up on the blog, and I almost averted my eyes).

    And there is nothing like second hand. God gave you two equal hands. Sometimes it's what's left. And sometimes , its all right.

    Nevertheless, I just opened them. My eyes, that is. I just went to indibloggies and voted for you ...

    Good luck !

  32. Chris, for a hot headed female like me (ywah, i have a blazing hot temper), it were your posts that calmed me down. Esp the ones with Jeremy and Jo. Second hand or not, you rock bro!! And to be honest, writing pages after pages of humour is not everyone's forte. I'm sure all your readers would agree.

    You want a vote?? I'd do a march for you in Mumbai...

  33. Hi.. I've never commented before, but i feel i have to do now.. I've voted for you. Even though i never comment, i have been following your blog regularly.. It has given me smiles, and has made me laugh uncontrollably at times.. Kudos !! Hope you win the coveted award !

    P.S : How nice it would be if our politicians also campaigned for votes the way you did !!! ;)

  34. LOL. funky. very. funny. very much!!!!!
    my first time here...I'll be back :)


  35. Done..........Good luck be with you!


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