Sunday, January 25, 2009

283.A racist of a third kind

I am not a racist. I am gonna talk about my own people. My own Blood. My own country people and hence this is definitely not a racist post.Today I am gonna talk about Men and Women from India. The focal point of this post will revolve around a very common phenomenon that everyone around the globe aspires for... Yes! "The Looking-Good factor".. Let me begin with the ladies.

Indian Women are the most beautiful women in the world. I do not have to prove it to the world. We have our very own proof. Sushmita Sen, Aishwarya Rai, Priyanka Chopra, Lara Dutta, Katrina Kaif, Mandira Bedi and the list goes on... (Mandira Bedi was added to this list on a special recommendation by the author himself) People all over the whole will agree with me about the beauty about the babes of MY country.
But something happens at middle age.
It is very sudden.
There is no warning.
It is like a tsunami .
Unexpected like the 9/11
You never see that coming.
The beautiful Indian women suddenly become an aunty.
Oh My God. Why such a disaster?

Indian Men are not left behind. We have Arjun Rampal,Chronicwriter, John Abraham, Dhoni and the likes...(Chronicwriter added his name here cos this is his blog) With Greek Image looks and a body that every girl on earth would yearn for.

But there comes the season called Autumn and all hairs break loose. The Indian Cricketer Sehwag is one classic example of this early Autumn attack. If you are an Indian male reader and if you are not yet attacked by the autumn bug, don't you laugh now. You never know when that attacks you.I know it will attack me too and i am ready for it.. The weaving therapy is a solution for us.

Another strange phenomenon that is especially found in Indian men is excessive-body hair. We have hair everywhere. Chest, privates, legs, backs and even inside the ears. When I wear a short trouser and sit next to a human being from any other race, I get this severe complex because I look like a monkey from the stone age. Was this whole thing a practical joke?

If you are an Indian woman reading this, don't you laugh at Indian men, because I have seen women who have more hair in their legs than mine.



  1. chriz... i have 1 thing to tell u... your imagination can b described in only one word... 'cranky'

  2. You're seriously in a crisis situation... at one place atleast. Classic case study for economics people, abundance at one hand and shortage on the other!!!

  3. ash is ur idea of a beautiful woman?????????? uuuuuuuuuuugh..

    n thanks 4 d john pic...*drooooooooool*

  4. Great.. So since we're beautiful during summer and spring.. we might as well make the most of it.. as far as autumn..we'll cross that bridge when we get there..autumn is actually beautiful in a way too though..:)..

  5. "Sushmita Sen, Aishwarya Rai, Priyanka Chopra, Lara Dutta, Katrina Kaif, Mandira Bedi"

    And you actually called them Beautiful!!!

    You are the guy for politics man:P No, i don't want to float your party and be a loser:P

  6. katrina is bful, but who said she is indian?? wat happened to ur facto thing chriz??

    n hairy post it was :D

  7. Hair raising post that Chriz.... :D

    I could be the one facing the autumn attack soon u know ...You really haven't mentioned remedies for this though.......

    Are there any ??

  8. women turning into aunties... who were the sample for your survey chriz.. lol..
    good one.. :D

  9. Indian wimmen r two ways abt it
    btw, Madhuri Dixit is no aunty, neither is Hema Malini, nor is Karisma Kapoor :)

    and most women also identify with 'balding'

    PS: U seriously think Mandira Bedi is BEAUTIFUL?

  10. lol
    am nt suffering from autumn bug

    coz am just 21...heard ki ur a victim of autumn bug.... journo told in a grp chat other day it true

    hey guess ur nt color blind.... mandira bedi looks beautiful

    and poor sehwag....u put his pics yaa:p

    am laughing man......guess ....last 4 lines were apt.......we indians have hairs to such an extent which compares us with monkey lolz......very funny man.... may be we r direct descendants of monkey :p


    nice.....loved it bro

  11. Hey whats this da some thing different from you ...... Yeppadi Yosikra da hehehheh

  12. he he tht was a very interesting but true post. :) Loved it to the core.

  13. thanks a million for that john abraham pic, criz:):)

    only sushmita is a 'real' beauty!!!

  14. We are very angry with you Mama. You should have mentioned our Beautiful Mumma and Our Dashing Dadda. Next time dont forget this

    Jer and Jo

  15. Come on tell me, tell me how much did mandira pay you to include her in the list of beautiful indian women?? mallika sherawat is not going to be happy about this.

  16. funny post...!!

    i found the autumn one more funny

  17. oye!! not to mention hairs as mustache on some women :P

  18. Lol, only you could write posts like these :) Thanks so much for John Abraham's pic *drooooooool*

  19. man! hair-fall is so scary... when it starts.. u tend to lose more cos of the fear :( one of my worst dreams i became bald.. the next day morning I was so happy get back my hair :)...
    mandira bedi is the odd one...

  20. Russell Peters again... "It is hot as sh*t in India and we are hairy! We are a hairy race, man!"


  21. u forgot to mention the woman mustache :) more visible for women wid dark hair, but u should not complain u male about being hairy, cz he does not matter for ya u don t HAVE TO shave, rather than us women have to get rid of that extra hair!!! would u do be attracted by hairy women who don t shave????
    u do have beautiful women in ur country as for Abraham.... anytime he wants :P

  22. jonny's pic is not nice

    ..and you have sexy legs.
    *asks god for forgiveness for lying*


    your posts are awesome!! how do you manage to write all these things so well?

  23. hairy :P....haha...



  24. Only Katrina is beautiful in the list and she is not Indian:)

  25. Chriz...every gal will have hair on her arms and's just that they shave it off just like you guys do to that on your face.You picked a confusing combination to comment on. You picked gorgeous ladies and below-average looking men...that cannot be used to come to a conclusion...! See consider U for Indian !! See ? :)

  26. lolzz-you are funny Chriz! How do you write so well and it is not even forced...why don't you be a stand up comedian? It would be a sureshot success!

  27. Nice post!! Funny!!

    Descendants..that was funny!!
    But poor Sehwag!! :P

    Nicely written!! WHAT A THOUGHT PROCESS!!



  28. I agree about hairy Indian women. They need to learn about shaving!

  29. @anusha
    thank you for the description

    i read between the lines

    yes i think so.. for that perfect figure and that eyes.. i am not taling about brains though

    the wig helps.. i know

    you want me to add your name in that list?

  30. @richa
    is sallu bhai gets her she will be an indian

    weaving is the remedy bro

    the girls mentioned in my post are the classic examples..

  31. @muse
    yes too much

    i wanted to add hemamalini.. but the lux incident made me stop writing abt it..

    darwin should have formulated his theory in india

  32. @shiv
    summa vettiyaa irundha idhu maadhiridhaan yedhaavadhu nadakudhu maams

    thanks ria!!!

    i love the other babes too

    @jeremy and jolena
    should i include your mom in the aunty list?

  33. @gayathri
    she dint pay men anything.. see i included my name in the list of men

    thanks sista

    oh man.. how did i miss that one... cha

    should i pose like john..

  34. @unknown
    mandira bedi the odd one? thats unfair bro

    yes russel peters talks too much about racism and in one of his standups he has talked about indians too.. yes ..

  35. @clement anna
    joblessness was the reason for the post


    yea i forgot to mention the mush part.. i feel bad now.. that would have been an interesting subject indeed

    thank you.. chriz is admiring his legs..

  36. @ chriz

    i second u for mandira bedi...and how come you missed my name in the men's list???so mean...

    well about guys hair thing- its a turn on for many foreigners- recently I've got two fans for it in my swimming pool- an austrian and an irish...they said i am the first man they know with so much body hair... :P

  37. @hem

    yes.. but i wud want her to be an indian

    haha... subliminal talk... r u praising me or was that sarcasm at heights

  38. @mithe

    i am a stand up comedian :)


    cheers.. cling

    true very true

    where do you swim man? i am gonna learn swimming too..
    sorry bro.. will add your next time.. and join the mandy bedi fan club...

  39. Soo... u turning into an uncle?? :D:D

  40. @shimmer
    dont laff.. youll turn into an aunty one day

  41. hmm i guess thats why looks shouldent matter...because in a few years itll all be gone :(

    but then they say the past is history and the future is mystery right?
    so i guess thats y most of us live for the 'present' :D

    and then again, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder...whats 'yikes' to you just might be 'woww' to someone else...and vice versa!

    ohh but i do agree that john is 'woww' material :p

  42. lolz!!! took me a while to get here...but here i am!


    yeah, tell us about your sample choice mate!

    Also, considering that the crisis situation might be awaiting at the next corner (for both, men and women), right now is the best time to go ask out (*ahem stalk) Mandira Bedi, right?

    (i always did like me a tattooed woman)

  43. Kaduvule kapathu! Thaanga mudiyale! A very hairy tale cannot even say that if autumn comes can spring be far behind! Hehe.. :P And don't you laugh at my Tamil, am learning yaar! Mandira Bedi...beautiful? Ahem ahem (A TB type cough!) :D

  44. Haha...good post there Bro! You deliberately left "Rose" out of this post? ??

    I dont like Ash...let me replace her thought with that of Asin (this is my comment ;))! :D

  45. Wr is KESHI!!!! there is a hot pic of John and she hasnt paid a visit yet??? duh...

    And Ash? beautiful? Chriz open ur eyes and look around.. ahem cough... i am talking abt me.. :D


  46. i m wondering if i should really laugh !! coz its a factual post i suppose :) liked your addition of mandiea bedi here !!

  47. Hooh......what a thought....where do you get your source i mean the basic idea to write such kinda stuff?

    Very funny indeed:))

  48. @pri
    so friend fell in love with a girl.. she looked like a raven,.. and i called his love blind... on the other hand my girl in college looked like a pig to his eyes... but even that girl dint fall for me

    yea bro stalking is what am planning to do next... thanks for coming here.. do come again..

    trees and plants grow in spring.. but tell a baldie about your spring thingie and look how he frowns at you

  49. @sree
    ippadiku rose? hehe
    asin.. yeah.. now i have to write all the names here i guess

    aish has a purfect figure and great eyes. and i like that...

  50. @pretty me
    mandira bedi is by default

    @m flower
    the more you think in the loo the more you blog

  51. very funny!
    this really is a nutty blog

    u r prepared for autumn bug?...weaving seems to be the remedy

  52. I came here yesterday and instead of commenting on her I commented to you! hahahaah...

    I agree that Indian women are very Beautiful! I have to pass on the comment about a hairy man! lol

    I laughed as always.


  53. dude, you too??? guess we shall have to draw lots and decide who stalks on which day! 3 days to each. while Sundays can be a 'comparing notes' day...

    ...what say?


  54. A lot of discrimination..we ought to do something riight? :P..

    And Sehwag looks like ROTFL. Serious ROTFL! :D

    Happpy Republic Day!

  55. good one chrizzy..yeah,women turn into aunties.. lol..

    u thot mandira bedi was beautiful??looks like u wer hooked to the tv sets durin WC '03..noodle strap effect?? :p

    Take care saaaarrr... :)


  56. hahahaha. too much body hair can be a bit of a put off :P

  57. @aparna
    not yet prepared for it men

    why did ya pass that one

    soon ill be hitced then you can have all the six days...

  58. "I know it will attack me too and i am ready for it"

    Chriz aren't you bald already?!

  59. @crystal
    dont laugh at looks.. that was not the intention behind this post

    mandira mantra is a secret to those who has seen the change between shanti and fourth umpire

    dont worry. you can wax

    please drink some water.. you'll be fine

  60. @thoorika
    if you see my current picture, the imagery picture that you have of me will disappear.. i look like ishant sharma men.. thala fullaaa mudi...

    the balding dialogues are added, cos i know i will be there one day

  61. :) My bro is almost bit by the Autumn Bug...haha...I will make him read this one...he will enjoy it for sure :D

  62. haha!..lmao! make it a point to get their body parts waxed unlike men!:P

    btw..i disagree with u when u say that mandira is beautiful..there's smthing abt her face which is excessively irritating..i mean u get bored n feel weary after looking at her face for 2 secs at a stretch!

    no offence!;)

  63. Eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww!!! Hehe. Disgusting really

  64. I feel that having a hairy body and hairy legs , is very sexy for a man ! and we Indian men should be pround of it .


Did you smile? Do let me know about your views of this post. Please read the post before commenting