76. Let us Snub

A very large community of human beings belong to the know-it-all community. A bunch of die hard feminists and a truck load of male chauvenistic pigs also exist in this world. Sometimes they get on our nerve and irritate us big time and we keep on wondering how to make them stop in their tracks. Here are some of the Insulting lines that can be adopted to snub people. Use them at your own risk.



1) Your English is pathetic. ( Tell this line in a serious tone, with a raised eye brow. You will never see that he/she bugging you after that)

2) The amount of beer that I have gulped is more than the volume of liquid that you would have peed in your whole life. ( Lines like this and few other dialogues that were used on my juniors in college days might be the reason behind me being suspended from college on two occassions. I am Innocent though)

3) Dealing with Lousy Language

After my engineering days, I happened to meet a couple of my childhood friends who returned to India after completing their graduation in US of A.We met at a coffee Joint and our conversation started.Their names were Sharon and Rhea.(Original names)
Sharon & Rhea : Hey chrissy.. Howideee.. ssup mayn.. you look pathetic... kick##$... F*** #$%...
I was amazed at their vocabulary skills that had the F word almost in the beginning and end of every sentence.They were using it as if it was their birth right.
Me:I am doing good. How is life? ( Same old startup line. I am pathetic. I know)
R&S: Dood. Like is Su #$% Ol$$ Fu#$%** RhO##$
Me : Why do you have to use the F word, every now and then? Do you think that the sentence is incomplete without it?
S&R: Are you living in the stone age mayn...F$%#... #$%%... M$$%%... Even school kids use these words these days... Grow up Doooood...Get a grip hunney... You are talking like an uncivilised barbarian who doesn't know about theF#$%#$$ big world...$%%...C#$%...
They gave me a ten minute lecture on my orthodox nature, and I did not have a way to stop them; and finally when I found it was going no where, I thought of ending up the conversation.
Me: I am not civilized yet.. I agree.. But people of noble birth do not have to use the F word to convey the message across. Also back in my place, Only hookers use such language.......
(I met them again after two years,recently and now they are uncivilized ;just like me. )


4) Go Home, Drink some milk and hit bed baby.( A usual liner to snub the smart donkeys)

5) But I have not found a way to snub the Fart machine- "My adjacent cubicle mate"..
Anyone care to give me some idea?

-Chronicwriter