This morning i got a call from a schoolmate of mine. He had met with an accident and broke his arm. Talking of arms, my 3rd girlfriend had five arms.. Not convincing right?. well .. am not gonna lie about it then.. as a matter of fact , breaking an arm is more or less similar to falling in love.. one of my friend, Mithun Raj broke his hand when the girl he proposed threw a rose at him. Little did he knew that she threw the Rose flower along with the pot. Talking about love , how can i forget my fourteenth girl friend Minu. Well infact theoretically,i was as much committed to her as I was, with my other girls.I even surprised her once by introducing her to Liya, who followed Minu in the hierarchy.I have given lot of surprises to my friends,kith,kin,my ex girlfriends and their boyfriends. But offlate my life has become barren without surprises.
Last Friday, I was travelling to my homeplace in a interstate bus. The seat next to me was not occupied.Born with a tongue that never ceases to blabber, i was eagerly waiting for some poor soul to come and occupy that seat so that i could start a knowledgable conversation. The bus stopped at a bus stop. A beautiful girl with her old grand-dad got into the bus. I knew instantly that she was in love with me cos she caught me staring at her and she gave back a dirty stare( But all romances begin with a dirty stare. so i did not lose heart) . I knew she wanted to sit next to me. But she was so shy. I understood that she ws so sad that she could not sit next to me,cos her grand dad sat next to me.
This old man started a conversation with me. He was talking about how he found it difficult to make both ends meet. Talking about " making both ends meet", i cant forget my friend Santhosh. He was successful in making the ends of a rope meet.But unluckily he met his end, because he inserted his head between the loophole formed by the rope and tried doing bunjee jumping from his fan.Wait!I actually started to write about surprises, but ended up here.Ooops I did it again...
I finally reached my hometown, and immediately my innermind told me that I had to give a surprise to my mom.My mom would go shopping with my neighbour aunt every saturday. I badly wanted to give her a big surprise when she came back home from her shopping.I went into my room and searched for my thinking cap. But alas i left it back in my cabin in office.So i had to settle down with the pillow cover. Here I am sitting in my bed , with my head inside a pillow cover trying to find a way to throw a surprise for my mom.
Finally i zeroed my options down to Two
1) Bring some girl to my place and introduce her to my mom as her future bahooo.
2) Stick a beauty mark on my cheek and dress myself up like an one-eyed thief and scare her.
Applying analytical tools like Annova and Chi-Square,I found that the probability of me dethroned from the post of Senior II was 0.9999 and hence i went for option number two.I covered myself with my stinking bed sheet(Dunno how I manage to sleep with it every night), and then applied lot of kiwi shoe polish and when I took a look at myself in the mirror, I was surprised to see that I looked better this way. I am a man of action and a great vision. So I wanted the planned mission to be a 100% success.Some old proverb," Practice makes a man perfect", came into my mind; and I started my preparations for the Act. I had a well defined plan designed for this major violent Act.
The plan: I would position myself on top of the coconut tree.The coconut tree is on the left corner of the front portion of my house(outside my house).As soon as my Mom enters the house, I would switch on the music system, which would Play the demonic sound that I have already recorded in it.Then I would swing down Using the Rope that I have tied to the tree and I would land in between my mom and the front door. I practiced this whole plan twice.
After two hours of practice,I was ready for the attack. I saw my Mom approaching our house. I switched on the music system and then I got hold of the rope and dived and landed just in front of my Mom.
1) The television remote control does not activate the music system.
2) Landing on your Feet completes the Act; but if you land on your Bum, chances are that you might get hurt.If the bedsheet completely wraps you, chances are that you might even get thrashed by your Mom.
3) When you get beaten up, chances are that atleast five people are there to witness you; which includes four neigbour BABES.