Wednesday, October 31, 2012

535. Cyclone Nilam's dangerous game.

Cyclone Nilam is on a rampage in Chennai. The school kids are happy for her because schools are closed. The poor are not happy because Nilam has made things worse for them. Those who live in the pavement are not seen these days. I do not know where they have gone? If you see someone on the road, please give them a shirt to wear.

In the workplace, the tiled floors are filled with mud. The men walk around with wet pants, people sneezing now and then. The atmosphere is not really healthy. The pantries are always occupied. The smoke joints are smokier than ever before. Coffee looks like a divine portion. 

The real faces of many people are unearthed by this cyclone. Colleagues who apply atleast 1 inch of paint on their faces are unrecognizable. On other days you can even hammer an 1 inch nail on their face without hurting their faces. But on days like this, they look like Chandramukhi Jyothika.

The men walk around with wet pants ; some of them with their pants folded and it looks as though they are walking around in three-fourths. It gives me the feeling that I am in a beach.

When you drive on the road, you get to splash water, mud on the faces of people. Sometimes it is funny and sometimes you feel sorry for them and when you are on the receiving end its not at all funny. This morning I splashed water on many people without any intention to do so. Some of them just did not react and some reacted with some gaalis. Now that I am used to it, I moved on.

When I came to work this morning, I heard my friends telling me that many offices are closed because of the news that Nilam might strike Chennai big time. Suddenly they all turned to my direction and looked at me. Some giggled and Some turned away. I did not know why they all did that. Then one colleague sent me a text message. When I opened the text message it read "Pull your zip up man". You should have seen my reaction.

I remember pulling my pant zipper up when I got ready this morning. But how did it come down? It must be Cyclone Nilam. Yes! Now I believe that Cyclones can do crazy things.


Tuesday, October 30, 2012

534. The Scientific Calculator

Every one would have used the object shown in the picture. I was introduced to this brick like device when I was in class 11. 

My mathematics teacher "Arulanandam" made an announcement in class - "Tomorrow all of you should bring a scientific calculator to class". We obeyed him religiously. 

We felt like scientists when we carried the scientific calculator. During those days, if a person owned a scientific calculator he was called a gadget freak. 

Days went by and few of my classmates became efficient in using the scientific calculator. I was only comfortable with the bottom 4 rows of keys in it. I could  do addition, subtraction, multiplication and division using it. But when it came to integration and differentiation, I had great difficulty. 

The top four rows of keys seemed like rocket science to me. In exams we were allowed to use the scientific calculator. But when the exam invigilator came near us to see what we were writing in the answer sheet, I would press lot of buttons in the calculator and would scribble some number in the answer sheet. Once the invigilator leaves, I would give a sigh of relief.

Days went by and I entered college to do four years of engineering. Soon we were asked to use the calculator to do Laplace, Fourier series applications. Chits and bits with answers were hidden inside the sliding cover of the calculator and they helped a lot during our exams. But after using the calculator for 6 long years we did not know the real use of it. 

I can see many readers telling me "Why Blood? Same Blood!" as they read this article. 

Moral : Even if you own half the world, if you do not know how to use it, it is no different from a person like us using a scientific calculator.

Note: I used my scientific calculator now to add two numbers ( 32 and 43) and I got 56 as the answer. GENIASS indeed.


Thursday, October 18, 2012

533. Stripping for a cause.

These days it has become a habit to shed clothes for a cause.

If you want to show your support for animals, then take home a pet animal and feed them. Stripping off your clothes and walking around nude does not help the animals in any way. I have often thought why PETA even encourages female models to strip and pose naked? How does that help animals? It only makes lot of young boys and many married men to ogle at these pictures and master the act of bating their desires to glory. (Enna solla vareinu puriyudhu illa? Arraichi pannaadheenga)

I have not seen men shedding their clothes for animals. If it happens (as in the above picture), would not it help the animals too? Then why aren't men shedding their clothes for animals. Where is the equality concept here? Don't the nudist models go through any puppy shame feelings? 

Another thing I notice these days is the over usage of sexual tones in advertisements. Almost all the body spray ads come with the "If you spray my product over your body, the girls will shed their clothes and run behind you". Namma ooru boys all will immediately go to the nearest shop, buy an axe deo and spray it all over their body with visualised expectations of what they  had seen on tv. See the print ad from axe deo depicted here. Why is that hand going there? Why would guys spray the deo on the crotches?  The most common place is the back and the armpits. The art directors for such ads have such gilugiluppu taste. 

The deos that we buy for approx Rs.100/- are no competition to the perfumes that are in the four digit rates. It is understandable that some sexual tone is given to an ad which places its emphasis on attraction factor. But why does a girl shed her clothes for a toothpaste ad? Beats me completely.

In this article, why am I adding a picture of the muscle flexing Vishal with well oiled body (forgot to take his bath) along with Sembatta hair Nayantara?

Did anyone note that Nayantara also has six packs?

Her six packs will definitely put Vishal's six packs to puppy shame indeed.