Feb 2, 2011

441. Suspense Advice Column


OK. Now! Stop drooling!! Can we get into the subject? I said STOP ogling at the picture. You might want to know who she is. If I say that she is my girlfriend, I am sure that you are not gonna believe me. How many lies can one digest from this blog? But Hold a Second. What if she is really my girlfriend? Still not convinced? All I could say is that the dame in this picture is taken.

Do you know that I have an alter-Ego? If you don't , it is high time that you got to know about Mr.X. He was the brain behind this blog. He acts as an agony-Uncle for many souls around the globe and even for some Men from Mars. In this post, he is gonna answer some personal questions that were sent to me by a few sincere souls who needed an answer. As I am busy with the girl in the picture, Mr. X would answer the questions.

My Dog doesn't raise his leg to pee. I am worried
- Rakhi Sawant

Don't worry Rakhi. The four legged creature that you have is not a Dog. It is a bitch. Bitches don't raise their legs for the shower performance as they can't balance on three legs.

My Vacuum Cleaner doesn't suck the dust particles. What should I do?
- Minisha Lamba
Buy a broom stick.

I don't have any talent. But I still want to be famous. Please Help
- Anonymous

Please get in touch with Ravindra Jadeja. Take three leafs out of his book. You will be an instant success.

I'm not selected in the Indian Cricket team for the 2011 world cup. This is not fair
- Sreesanth

Join the Indian Cheer girl team and support the team.But beware of drummer Sivamani. He would smack your rear end, if you don't dance to his beats.

I doubt that my wife is having a secret affair with her Boss.
- Vijay

You are right. I am her Boss

I am a 28 year old guy who is still single. What should I do to get a girlfriend?
- Anonymous

Are you Chronicwriter?

I like the Tamil actress Tamanna. How should I let her know of my Love?
- Suresh Kumar, Age 42

Since when did human beings start falling in love with white Lizards?

The other day, I saw a girl in a low waist Trousers. She wore her jeans in such a manner that everyone could see her underwear. Should I also wear my jeans like that? I am a 18 year old confused boy.
- Mike

You can wear a low waist Jean; or you can even avoid wearing a trouser. But make it sure that you not in the vicinity of Dogs. I would advice you not to wear a red underwear. If you do so, the author of this blog would definitely rip that underwear from your body.

What Should I do to get a sexy Body like Chronicwriter?
- Salman Khan

Stay Hungry! Stay Foolish! Don't eat much.

Who is the girl in the picture?
- Mandira Bedi

If I say that she is Chronicwriter's fiancée, would you believe me?

-Mr.X

7 comments:

  1. Of course I won't believe you, Chriz, not after all the earlier drama :P :D.

    Nice post: I like the "white lizard" description :D Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The best ones are
    "Are you Chronicwriter?"
    and
    "Since when did human beings start falling in love with white Lizards?"

    Good post! :) And as always, she is definitely not your fiancee :P

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nah, I don't believe that she's Chriz' fiancee, and there is a saying here,
    just that the goal is guarded by a goalkeeper, it doesn't mean that you shouldn't take a hit. :P

    Nice post.

    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

    ReplyDelete
  4. Pretty sure that Miss.Untitled.jpg is not your girl friend ;)

    White lizard!!! that was the best part :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. i have seen her somewhere..I know..you are so super lucky :D

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey...since when did they start producing the white lizards with great butts..
    I will accuse u of trying to please your jealous feminine followers

    ReplyDelete
  7. Lovely post :) hehe loving the answers too :)

    ReplyDelete

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