Friday, December 03, 2010

435. He Kissed Me

The other day, I was in Subway munching on a 6 inch Beef Roast and sipping on some Coke. I saw him sitting a few tables across me. He was sitting alone and eating too. When I looked at him, he saw me staring at him. He was fair and handsome and he must have been in his late twenties.He had powerful eyes. There was an instant chemistry between us. I did not know how to react. Before he could respond to my stare, I gave him a gentle smile. He was smiling at me too. I knew that I was straight and I was pretty sure that I did not have any feelings for this guy. But the vacuum between him and I became so strong. I wasn't sure of the thoughts that were running in his head. Something in my mind said, "Chrony! Go and talk to him". I got up to go to his table. To my surprise, he got up and started walking towards me. We were defying physics. "Like poles do not repel", I thought to myself. Soon we were standing very close to each other. The air between us was so thick that one could have actually cut it with knife. "Was he attracted to me?", I thought to myself. Suddenly the unexpected thing happened. He came closer to me and kissed me on my lips. Everyone around us were stunned. A kid started giggling. The manager of the place walked up to us and said, " Sir, Kissing the mirror is not allowed in this place".

Now I have the attention of all my readers, I would like to convey an important message to every one.. Many of my posts originate from the dark chambers of my creative brain. When the dark Chambers go on a strike, my brain goes for plan-B. Plan-B is very simple. All I have to do is take a Little Johnny, Calvin or any joke from any movie or mail forward and build a story around it. I never have a systematic way in writing my blogs. But I have to admit that most of the ideas are born in the toilet. Now, let me detail the exact point that I wanted to convey through this post. There are many things in life that make us go mentally numb. Things that make us smile sometimes and sad at other times. Things that make us sad are those things that would even make us upset. I had never been upset for anything in the past two years. Let me not beat around the bush any longer.I am gonna narrate a very serious issue here. Something as serious as what Pamela Anderson wore on Big Boss 4 or how Sreesanth was slapped by Bhajji. OK, before you press Alt+F4, let me open the subject.
This post is about my blog posts being forwarded around in the e-mail world. A mail forward of "Gabtun's 9 mantras for a happy life" came to my inbox. I was happy to see my blog post doing the rounds in the Internet world. But I was surprised when I saw the signature " Concept by Saurav" at the bottom of the mail. I would like to tell Mr. Saurav that the concept originated in my head when I was spending time in the the loo. A friend from India called me over the phone and told me that my funny post "Animal scientist" was being circulated in his office and one of his colleagues was claiming that he wrote the article. Apparently he was brainy enough to remove the first paragraph of the post to prove hi claim. I don't become sad when I come across things like this. I don't mind when someone claims that they wrote it. Next time you copy my posts and forward it as a mail. You can also add a line saying ," An Idiotic blogger-Chronicwriter has copied this idea from me and he has posted the same material on his blog". By adding a line like that, you would have the upper hand because people often trust the first one who calls foul.

For those who do not know, I would like to remind that this blog is strictly copy-right and copy-left protected under the Corporate and Criminal Protection act. This act was jointly cleared by Kuresh Salmadi and Darkha Butt. So if you wish to forward any of my posts, please provide the URL of this page.

DO NOT IGNORE THIS. Last week my friend ignored what I said and in five minutes he had a crow shit on his head. So save your heads now!! Forward this to everybody you know and enjoy the following benefits .

50+ forwards : You will no longer get caught by your boss while reading blogs or while Trying to flirt with the girl/guy in the adjacent cubicle.

40+ forwards : Guys, your friend's girlfriend will kiss you within the next one week. Girls, the guy you love will stop flirting with other girls.

30+ forwards : You will meet the love of your life in the next one hour. Please move out of your cubicle and walk around your office to experience this reality in your life. Make sure that your boss doesn't catch you walking around in office.

20+ forwards : You will get married in exactly one year from today. After one year, if you are still unmarried, please forward this to 20 + friends.

10+ forwards : You will go on a dream date!! (Remember to sleep well)

1-10 forwards : Guys, you will get a chance to take a Hot Girl for a ride on your bike. Girls! Please make your younger brother to sit between you and the guy to prevent damages.

0 forwards : Guys, you will be slapped, cussed, by a girl, her mother and father and you will also be punched in your groin by a three year old kid. Girls, Your boyfriend will ditch you. Remember! No one will charge your mobile phone and give you free lifts on the bike/car.

-Chronicwriter ( The forward idea was copied from a mail forward )


  1. buahahahahah :) well 0 fwds it is.. ya said only bf will ditch me, i styll have my hubby ;) n well, no 1 will recharge?! - gud, im postpaid, n free lifts,- hubby to the rescue again :D KISS YA ARSE :*

  2. @Rantra :) You will be blessed with fart therapy :P

  3. hilarious!!yet an other farter piece :P it is certainly disgusting when you find someone claiming your work just like that.but you are so cool enough to convert it this way.

  4. hahaahaha well the opening lines were gripping.
    Why don't boys ever get a free recharge?

  5. i knew it was a mirror... i kiss the mirror all the time... but not in

  6. Thala sema matter , naan apadiye shock aiten. One doubt, is tht y yu take loooong time ib the toilet :) sit think and write soft copy of blogs ha ha

  7. lolx! been some time since i dropped by... now i rmmbr why i have you blogrolled! :P

  8. Hilarious Stuff! You had me going with the first para!!!!

  9. @Shari : did you forward to more than 10 people?

    @ Blasphemous Aesthete : boy's would get a free recharge if they were gay

    @Akshay : you smarty fellow

    @Hary: There is a mirror in the loo :)

    @Loshini : welcome back.. honoured

    @ Teenu : :/ Reinstating my orientations :)

  10. "Sir, Kissing the mirror is not allowed in this place".

    didn't see that


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