417. Murphy's Law played volleyball in my life

Back in my college days my friends and I used Murphy's Laws in our conversations. Recently I decided to find the origin of the saying "Murphy's Law" and did a small study on it and I learnt a lot from the study.

Murphy's Law ("If anything can go wrong, it will") was born in 1949 .It was named after Capt. Edward A. Murphy, an engineer working on Air Force Project MX981, (a project) designed to see how much sudden deceleration a person can stand in a crash.One day, after finding that a transducer was wired wrong, he cursed the technician responsible and said, "If there is any way to do it wrong, he'll find it." The contractor's project manager kept a list of "laws" and added this one, which he called Murphy's Law.Shortly afterwards, the Air Force doctor (Dr. John Paul Stapp) who rode a sled on the deceleration track to a stop, pulling 40 Gs, gave a press conference. He said that their good safety record on the project was due to a firm belief in Murphy's Law and in the necessity to try and circumvent it. Aerospace manufacturers picked it up and used it widely in their ads during the next few months, and soon it was being quoted in many news and magazine articles. Murphy's Law was born.

Trivia: One important fact about Murphy's Law was that it was not actually coined by Murphy, but by another man of the same name.

Some of the Murphy's Rules/Laws that I have experienced in my life will form the content of this post.

1.If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something

I had a steady girlfriend for two years. (2004-2006). Everything seemed to be going so well. But in the summer of 2006, I was caught red-handed by my "Then-Girlfriend" for two-timing with a junior from the same college. I tried explaining to her that I wasn't two timing because I knew that two timing was bad. Later she came to know that I was indeed telling the truth. Still she left me.

Moral : If only I had not been an innocent guy, I would have known that three-timing was bad too

2. Things get worse under pressure.

Have you ever peed in your own pants during your 10th state board exams? I have. The invigilator did not allow me to take a leak thinking that I was trying to cheat in exams. I always performed well under pressure. But this was a different kind of pressure. I thought that no one else knew about it because my action shoes had shock absorbing function and not a drop of water seeped out of my shoes. But still, why did Lavanya and Shireen giggle at me. How did they know?

3. Everything takes longer than you think

I am going to travel back to my engineering days (1999-2003). I spent one year of my college life in Hostel. Those were the best and worst days of my life. The bathroom was an open room. I was so shy in the beginning. I used to take bath with my T-Shirt and my pants on. But three friends of mine (Augustine, Dinesh and Robert) would took bath without any clothes on . Very soon the shyness in me disappeared and I was comfortable taking bath in complete freedom. All the other guys looked down on us as if we were sinners . I guess we made them look inferior for many reasons.Two years ago, I went back to my college and took a picture of the Toilet. I was shocked to realise that the toilets did not have any doors now. When I was in hostel, at least the toilets had doors. There were 8 toilets lined one after the other. Except for the last toilet, all the other toilets had a latch on the doors. Each Toilet were named after a country. The latch less toilet was named "France". 147 guys stayed in the hostel and waiting in the queue to get into a toilet was an every morning activity for all of us. No one dared to go to France with fear of getting caught for more than 2 reasons. The four naked maniacs (Including me) always chose France because waiting in the queue took longer than we thought. Soon the college management came to know about this and repaired France's door. But we broke it again.

4. Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.

Going to a salsa party is a very irritating exercise, if your salsa partner is not your girlfriend. It is even more irritating when your salsa partner has a boyfriend. I always had to seek permission from my salsa partner's boyfriend before taking her out for a salsa dancing session. The boyfriend would call her every 5 minutes to check if I had misbehaved with her or not. At times like this, I wished that I had a girlfriend too. But when I realised the meaning of the words "All that glitters is not gold", I was happy that I was still single.

5. When you are about to sneeze,somebody laughs at you and you fail to sneeze.

The first ever Indiblogger meet outside the Indian soil will take place this evening in Singapore. The meet is called #indising. 12 Budding Indian bloggers will be meeting and sharing their views on world peace.

I would also be presenting a 143 page report on the topic "How to catch Osama?" during the meet. But Murphy's Law has played its part on this issue also. I am running a high temperature and the possibility of my presence in the meet looks very bleak. But for once, I am gonna prove Murphy wrong. I am taking my camera along with me.

-Chronicwriter

416. Humor for dummies

Being a Humorist, I should have done this long ago. It has taken me 416 entries to write a post on Humor. Humor is a term that makes everyone happy. Happiness is almost synonymous with Humor. Humor can induce sadness and irritation also, if it is not used in an appropriate manner. This post talks about the nuances in becoming a good Humorist.

What is Humor?

Humor is the ability to spread smiles in the hearts, minds and souls of people. Many would define humor in many ways. The operational definition of humor varies from person to person.Humor comprises three dependent variables namely

1. Knowledge base
2. Emotional balance
3. Presentation

Knowledge base is nothing but the Cognitive experience of a person. The cognitive experience of a person is necessary to initiate the humor process. A good humorist should essentially have a broader knowledge base

Emotional balance is the driving force of Humor. After the content (Knowledge base) is formalised in the mind, the emotional balance of the person acts as a thrust in driving forth the content. Mirth (Joyous mood) is a very healthy emotional drive

Presentation is the execution component of humor. Even if a person has a very good percentage of the first two variables, but still lacks presentation skills, the humor form will not be effective. Hence presentation is the most important part of the humor process. Presentation is the only component where a physiological experience also takes place in addition to the psychological experience that takes place when the other two variables are in action.

Humor is a gameplay of the mind and it varies with place and time. Hence a joke that was not at all humorous when it happens , would appear to be humorous at a later point of time. Even sadness can take a humor form in future.

(eg - A person who is going through a tough phase in life when he loses his girlfriend will be extremely sad when he experiences that emotion. But at a later point in life, the same emotion would make him laugh)

Humor is a depiction of one's true colors. When we see someone slipping and falling down, 9 out of 10 times we would end up laughing at the situation. Our initial emotional reflexes are tuned to transmit happiness when someone gets hurt. Only if the injury is serious, then our emotions transmit other form of emotions such as sympathy,sadness,guilt.

Humor is often the experience of renegaded nature of humans. We often have a forbidden happiness when we break the rules. Back in my college days, when ever I broke a hostel rule or a college rule, my friends and I would laugh at it. Talking aloud in the library also brought out humor in us.

Humor is an enzyme that lives in every human being. Everyone uses it in different proportions. Everyone has it. But not everyone use it to the fullest. That differentiates the humorists from the rest.

What is meant by Sense of Humor?

It is the ability to relate to human emotions and act in a manner so that it makes everyone smile. A good humorist will be sensible to the psychological responses of his audience. How ever most humorists are not sensible to the emotions of people because their presentation style answers the question "What is Humorous?". A sensible humorist will always have a presentation style that answers the question " What do you experience as being Humorous?".

Laughter is often associated with Humor. But one need not laugh to experience humor.

As individuals we tend to experience humor by either "getting it" (which tends to be cognitive or intellectual response), by feeling it (which tends to be an emotional response), or by laughing at it (which is more of a physiological response). There is a wide range of life's experiences that are experienced as humorous. Like beauty being in the eyes of the beholder, humor is in the funny bone of the receiver of the experience - Dr. Steve

What are the different types of humor?

If you are an orkut user you would have come across words like dry humor, slapstick humor, straight humor, sarcastic humor, warped humor etc... I am not gonna explain all these different classifications of humor styles. You can easily google them and read about it.

When I hear the word " Types" of humor, only two things come to my mind

1. Me - Humor
2. You - Humor

When I make fun of myself , it is Me-Humor and When I make fun of others, it is You-Humor. It is very easy to be a You-humorist. Most of the stand up comedians fall under this type. But to be a ME-humorist, one has to have a very sound mind and should be very thick skinned.

Sarcasm is a major component of You- Humor. Personally I feel that sarcasm is not at all humor. It makes people laugh. But if that is done at the cost of hurting someone Else's ego, then it is better to avoid satire (sarcasm) form of humor. Hurting humor is very different from hearting (healthy) humor. Very few have mastered the hearting humor art form.

Let me give you some examples

• Stand up comedians like Robin Williams, Russel Peters, Carlos Mencia fall under the You-Humorists category. They make fun of others mainly through racist jokes or through foul language ( cheap humor). They indeed have a good fan base because of their effective use of the third component of humor -"Presentation"
• Comedians like Sacha Baron Cohen (Borat), Rowan Atkinson (Mr.Bean), Wilbur Sargunaraj fall under the Me- Humorist. They make fun of themselves and that requires guts.

I am not concluding that Me-Humor form is better than You-Humor form. Even You-Humorists can be sensible to emotions. Personally I have experimented these two humor forms in my blog. I have bashed myself up in many of my posts. I have also bashed some public personalities in my blog.

The Tamil comedian Vadivel is an excellent user of the Me-Humor Type. He bashes himself in his movies. How ever the You-Humor exponent Vivek who was very popular in the early nineties soon found that he is losing ground against Vadivel and he too has started using Me-Humor in his latest movies (Padikadhavan).Gift of the gab is the best tool that can be used in both these types of humor. The Tamil actor Sandhaanam and anchor Sivakarthikeyan have this gift. If you want to improve your humor quotient, please watch "Whose line is it anyway"

When should I use humor?

1. When another person uses humor with you. (Sensible humor)
2. When the other person is comfortable with you.
3. Situation is socially "appropriate. (Cracking a joke in a funeral will not be appropriate)
4. Effective usage of Me-Humor with the incorporation of "Gift of the gab"
5. When you use You-Humor , try to make fun of the situation and not the person

If I am humorous, won't people think that I am a Joker?

Let them think. Why do you care? Everyone has an opinion. Opinions are like Butt-holes. Everyone has one. Why do you care about someone Else's butt hole? Live your own life; but let your humor be sensible.

What is your opinion on Laughter Therapy?

Laughter therapy is gaining momentum through out the world as a major therapeutic exercise. But the sad point in laughter therapy is that it is disjointed humor. The cognitive function of the brain is not put to effective usage. People just gather in circles or in matrix form and laugh at regular intervals.I don't have a grudge against laughter therapy. But personally I feel that it is not a holistic humor form. Laughter therapy is just a mechanical exercise that psychologically kicks the heart rate of a person.

Humor is a spontaneous exercise that is planted inside the soul of every human being. It can never be triggered artificially

-Chronicwriter

About the Author

Prason Christopher Robin (Chrony/Chriz) is a Humorist and a Humor Therapy expert and is the founder of the stream " Humor management ". He is a researcher, specializing in the field of management psychology. He is also a stand up comedian (In fact, he sits on a stool and cracks jokes. So it would be fitting to call him a sit-down comedian). He talks all the time and serves as a guest lecturer for Management Schools (Poor students). He is the CEO and CFO of Chronicwriter Incorporation.

* CEO = Chief entertainment Officer

* CFO= Chief Fun Officer.

Love letters can be forwarded to prason@chronicwriter.com

415. When I turned Nine

Note: This is not a Humor post. This is a review about a film that caught my attention recently. Humor posts will continue. This is a Chrony-break.

Korean Movies have always had a special place in my heart. No Artificial acting. No super hero stunts. No punch dialogues. Most of the South Korean Movies present nature of life in a realistic way.

Yun-In-Hoe is one of my favorite Korean Movie directors. His movie "Ahopsal Insaeng" (When I turned nine) is my personal favorite. The movie is close to my heart because of many reasons

1. The depiction of first love in school

2. The Screenplay and cinematography of the movie

3. The wonderful music score

4. The brilliant acting of Kim Suk (The 9 year old hero of the film)

5. Powerful script and inspirational dialogues (The English Subtitles)

6. The class room scenes which pulled me back to my school days.

7. The crisp editing

8. I was reminded of Renu when I saw this film.

Most of you might not have seen the movie; Most of you would not even care to see this movie. This post would give you a literal taste of this movie.

The Story

The movie takes us to the 1970s in Korea.Yeo-min (Kim Suk) is a nine-year old boy in third grade. He has so many things to take care of. He must defeat ‘black swallow’ ( the villain kid) who is picking on other kids, share his lunch with Gi-jong ( his best friend) who lives with only his sister, and sell ice cream to save enough money to buy sunglasses for his mother (she has poor eye sight). In short, he is the dependable son for his poor parents, and a cool, tough guy at school. He’s good at dictations and knows the multiplication table by heart.

The movie travels in a simple and funny phase until a proud and haughty girl named Jang Wu-rim comes from Seoul to his class, and his life that was so peaceful turns into turmoil. He feels his heart fluttering in a way he has never known before. He asks his friend for some advice but he is too busy with his own love life. So Yeo-Min writes a Love letter to Wu-rim. His teacher takes the love letter he had written and now everybody knows about it. His love life keeps turning for the worse until finally he gets accused for stealing Wu-rim’s money.

Wu Rim ill treats Yeo-Min through out the movie, but Yeo-Min shows to all the men in the world the meaning of the word "Gentleman" through his calm and composed forgiving attitude.In the process Wu-Rim accepts Yeo Min as her best friend,and just when he tries to propose to her once again he realises that she is moving back to Seoul the next day.

Although both of them could not see each other again, they still remember each other. Yeo-min notices a parcel that Woo-rim has left for him. A pair of glasses for his mother was inside the parcel along with a letter. The tear drops that flow along his cheek line when he finds out that Woo-Rim was also in love him with , would make everyone to shed tears. The dialogues in the movie are so strong that every one of us could relate to it.

Chrony Rating : 8.2/10

Chrony Verdict : Must Watch

Chrony Experience : Sure to leave a lump in your throat and Trust me on this, You would remember your first love in school when you see this movie
Chrony Similar Movies : Children of Heaven

414. Gabtun's 9 mantras for a Happy life.

How to lead a Happy life? The whole world is searching to find an answer to this question. Many experts have come up with many theories and mantras to inspire people to lead a happy life. Such mantras are well suited for many and ill suited for a few. I was under the assumption that a 100 % successful mantra was never ever proposed by anyone. Very recently I discovered that "Gabtun" VJKunt has proposed "9 mantras" for a happy life. He practices these 9 mantras in his life too. Very few practice what they preach.

If you are not familiar with Gabtun, you are wasting your time on this earth. He is the Past, Present and Future leader of this world. He has killed each and every Single Bagisdan (Pakistan) Terrorist. 26/11 happened just because he was sleeping that fateful night. Osama Bin Laden is under hiding because he is scared of our Gabtun. Without much ado, let me state the "9 fold mantra for a happy life" by Gabtun

1. Be Sincere

2. Fall in Love

If love like this exist in real life, i do not want to be a part of it.

3. Understand your Life's purpose

4. Get married and produce babies

5. Be Professional in your actions

The compaq laptop was infected with a deadly virus after this photo shoot was over and it had to be trashed

6. Meditate everyday

7. Adopt a pet animal

The dog went into amnesia after this photo was taken.

8. Indulge in sports activities

The Dog died after this picture was taken. The remains of the dog were scrubbed from the bottom of Gabtun's slippers. Please do not allow M. Gandhi to know about this

9. Fight against Injustice

Note: This post is dedicated to M.Raja (The photographer of the last photo). M. Raja died of depression and heart failure. Reliable sources say that He saw something which you and I cannot see in this picture.

-Chronicwriter

413. Why do I have (a) bad English?

Every time I type a blog post, I always try my level best to avoid grammatical glitches and spelling mistakes. But I always end up making at least one error in every post. I don't know whom to blame? Should I blame my school? Should I blame my English teachers? Should I blame my folks? or should I blame my own laziness? I did my entire schooling in a place called Nagercoil. I studied in three schools in my life .

1.Kindergarten to class 5 - Morton English Primary School

English was an enforced language in that school. Our standard of English never improved. In fact, it got bad because even the teachers were not comfortable with the English language. I don't want to sound like a racist here. Still our English during those days sounded like the Chinese speaking English.The following are some of the conversations that my friends and I have had with our class teachers.

• Miss, Chriz was stole my rubber ( The usage of "was" to denote a past event was used by us and our teachers never corrected us) {Note:Rubber is the Indian English for eraser}
• Miss, Can I go bathroom? ( I am sure that many of my readers have the habit of peeing in the bathroom.) The word toilet was not much used in my school
• Miss, I winned ( I have won)

The only solace for me was that we used to converse in English at home. But my sister had a good grasp of the English language. She used to correct me every time and hence I would often resort to speaking in Tamil at home. But still the sitcoms helped me to stay in touch with English. Wonder years, Oshin, Full House were some of my favorite programs on TV.

2. Class 6 to Class 10 - Scott Christian Higher Secondary School

The first English medium school in South India. It was started by Christian missionaries centuries ago. English was an alien language in this school. The yearly tuition fee was Rs.12. I was introduced to Tamil Golden words in this school. Speaking in English was considered a crime by every student who attended this school. Hence I never had an opportunity to converse in English.The teachers were very good. Yet the students were not up to the mark.

But again, the conversations at home helped me to stay in decent touch with the language.. My sister's vocabulary improved by a huge margin and I failed to understand 90 % of the English words that she used. My folks made English a compulsory language at home and I was the butt of all English Jokes at home.(I was the blonde at home. This is why I added the blonde picture in the first place).

When my folks found that their enforced method was not effective, they made it compulsory for me to read the "HINDU" newspaper everyday. I would spend time on the sports column. It never worked for me. I had love for sports; but I hated English very much.

3. Class 11 and Class 12 - CSI Matriculation School

When nothing worked, my folks finally decided to put me in the only ENGLISH-speaking school in Town. Little did I realize that the parents of my classmates from my previous school also had similar ideas. A bunch of guys from Scott School landed up in CSI Matriculation school and we were so comfortable talking in Tamil.

Soon I figured out that CSI matriculation was in fact worser than my previous school. The students of this school were from the families of upper middle class homes , NRIs and VIPs in town. Hence English came very naturally to most of them. But unfortunately, there were lost sheep like me too.

Most of the students were really good. Still the teachers were an utter failure. Mani sir was the best example for this. The British Government should erect a statue for him for his noble deeds in English. He is still surviving as a teacher in the school. A present day student of that school took pains to scribble down Mani sir's golden words in a piece of paper. Click the pictures below to have a better taste of Mani's English.

No wonder the students call him Mutant Mani

My English started improving only after I started writing. I also realized that even if one has a good grasp of the English language but still falls short of ideas and content, he/ she doesn't make a good writer. If only I had stayed inside my comfort zone developing an inferiority complex because of my bad English, I would have never started this blog in the first place.

I would like to thank my dear friend Srini, who takes time to constructively correct my English. There have been many such good souls who have helped me in my blog journey. I sincerely thank all you guys. This post doesn't answer the question, "Why do I have a bad English?". But still you would have sensed the take away pointers from this post, if you understood what I am actually talking about.

Do you think that you are not worth it? Did any one say to you that are a loser? If you are in such a position, I have a story for you

Once a farmer found an abandoned eagle nest and a warm eagle egg inside it. He took it to his farm & laid it in the nest of one of his hens.The egg hatched and the eagle grew up along with the chickens and spent its entire life in the farm with the chickens. It rarely looked up. When it was very old, one day it lifted up its head and saw above it a wonderful sight - an eagle soaring high above in the sky. Looking at it, the old creature sighed and said to itself,"If only I'd been born an eagle".

Many of us are like the eagle. We often curb our capabilities and slumber within our comfort level. We seldom come out of our shell and exhibit our full potential.

We might have attempted and failed in achieving our goal in life. If we see some one attempting the same thing, we often discourage them based on our experiences.

We all have an eagle within us. Do we realize that? or Are we still chickened to acknowledge that?

-Chronicwriter

412. Nonsense news

Disclaimer: The following news items will not be found anywhere else in the internet world. The concept behind the news was born in Chronicwriter's mind and was digested through this thoughts and he has excreted it in this page.

The biggest two sex scandals of this year were made by an American and an Indian. How ever the sex scandal of Nithyananda (The Indian) beats the scandal made by Tiger Woods (American) by a great deal because Doctors are still confused about Nithyananda's Gender. To honor Nithyananda, a tamil movie on his life will soon hit the movie halls around the globe. Actor Vadivel is playing as Nithyananda in the movie.

The Indian Police is cracking their brains in the Nithyananda Investigation. If the investigators take a closer look at the following picture, the mystery behind the case would be solved.

Nithyananda is still claiming that he is innocent. He should take a leaf out of the book of a senior artist of similar trade and learn to accept his mistakes.

Moving to an entirely new topic, we would remember that Obama was presented with a Nobel Peace Prize. Though critics claimed that he was not eligible for the Peace Prize, I certainly believe that by awarding the prize to Obama, the peace prize committee has tied his hands from waging wars against any country in the world. They should have awarded the peace prize to Senior and Junior Bush and tied the hands of the Father- Son duo.

On a similar note, the people of Tamilnadu have chosen Dr. Joseph Vijay as their favorite actor for his amazing comedy roles in Tamil movies for the past five years on a trot. Such awards would enable the Tamil audience to witness much more comedy roles from their most loved comedian.

Reliable sources also revealed to Chronicwriter that director Shankar is planning to do a Tamil remake of the Hindi movie "Three Idiots" (Aamir Khan starrer). Sources say that Vijay will be donning Kareena Kapoor's role in the Tamil remake of the super hit movie.

Moving on to sports news, the entire world is waiting for the 2010 world cup football. Chronicwriter will be supporting the Samba boys from Brazil. Brazil has the best forward (Kaka) and the best Goal keeper (Julio Caesar) in the business. But again Brazil is pitted in a very tough group alongside North Korea, Ivory Coast (which has the Dangerous Drogba) and the Powerful Portuguese. It is going to be a tough competition indeed. Which is your favorite team?

May the best team win.

-Chronicwriter

411. Please save the Sombu - Only 1411 left

Sombu (Mutka in Hindi) is a utensil used for storing water. It is made up of mud/brass/plastic/aluminum or even stainless steel. The brass Sombu is the most common utensil used in many Indian households in the early years of the post Independence era. I remember seeing my grandparents using this brass vessel. Now a days the sombu has almost faded away from common usage. This post will in no case, help the sombu manufacturers to start a mass production of sombus. But this post will definitely enlighten everyone of the different uses of Sombu.

Sombu - The water vessel

This is the basic use of a sombu. But do not under estimate sombu because of this. This is just the beginning. The Sombu has various other uses too.

Sombu - Peek a Poo

In India, before the advent of the "Toilet system", the green pastures were used by men and women for excretory purpose. The water filled sombu is always taken along for the rear end cleaning process. Thus water from the sombu is used for both drinking as well as cleaning

Sombu - Hit or Miss

The consumption of beetle leaf is very high in India. Sombu is used for the spitting of chewed pawn. Hence Sombu, not only provides, it receives too

Sombu - The decision maker

80 % of India's population comprise of villagers. If there is any dispute in a village the panchayat leader (Naattaamai) resolves the dispute between the villagers. The Naattaamai usually delivers his judgement by sitting under a Bodhi/ Banyan Tree. A sombu is always placed on his left side. If he has the habit of chewing beetle leaf, he will use the sombu as a Hit or Miss object. If not the sombu gives him moral support to pass the judgement.

Sombu - The Sauna Belt

Every woman would aspire to have a perfect figure. The Kareenas and the Deepikas of India have even touched the size zero mark. The market is flooded with all sorts of devices that help women to attain the perfect figure. Most of my friends wear sauna belts underneath their clothes (Do not ask me, how I know it) to have a perfect figure. But many do not know that the sombu is used by women to attain the perfect shape too. A bigger form of Sombu (Kudam in Tamil) is used by women to carry water from well. The water filled kudam is placed on the hips and is carried. This exercise gives a perfect sand-timer shaped figure to women who practice it. This form of exercise is slowly fading away from practice.

Sombu - The Hair conditioner

Some women even had the habit of carrying the Kudam (big sombu) on their heads. It is believed that such an action prevented hair loss and strengthens the hair. It was also used as a curing medicinal form for sinusitis. In the souther state of Tamilnadu, a dance form called Karagaatam is very famous. In this dance form, a kudam is placed on top of the head of the dancer and the dancer balances the kudam without any other support.

Sombu- Inhaler/Facial

Boil some water and pour it in the sombu, add a tea spoon of vaporub. Place your face on top of the sombu and cover your head with a towel. If you have blocked nose, you will feel alright in seconds. If you have a head ache, your head ache will flee. If you have blackheads on your face, they will disappear. Now a days to remove blackheads, one has to shell out 200 bucks in a beauty parlour.

Sombu - The iron Box

With ever increasing power cuts in India, it is very tough to rely on the power supply to iron your clothes using an electric iron box. The brass sombu had been my friend during my college days as an iron box. All I had to do was boil some water and pour it in the sombu and then use it as an iron box to iron my clothes. Believe me! Cotton shirts will become crisp like a paper. No one knew the secret of my crisp cotton shirts back in college. Now you all know it.

If you know any more uses of the brass vessel, please add it in the comments section

-Chronicwriter